For those of you who have not done this, I advise bringing a friend for the inevitable harness structural failure and resulting chase. Although, since ferrets are prone to being distracted (and what is more distracting to an inside ferret than outside stuff), you may be able to squeak by on your own.
Here are the steps for taking your fert on an outside journey:
- Buy harness. Imagine your ferret dressed up in it, adorably marching by your side through the city. This will be your only moment of joy.
- Attempt to put the harness on your ferret. No, you may not use glue or staples.
- Finally, after putting the harness on tighter than William Shatner's girdle, take your bulging-eyed ferret outside.
- Place ferret on the ground, and stand back to watch him or her take in the marvels of nature.
- Watch ferret scrape him- or herself on the ground, trying to get the harness off.
- Watch ferret get the harness off.
- Run after the ferret, catch ferret, sigh in frustration.
- Repeat steps 2 through 7 until exhaustion sets in.